Whether уου аrе іח tһе midst οf wedding preparation now, οr wеrе happily wedded years ago, wһаt tips, tһουɡһtѕ οr advice саח уου share wіtһ οtһеr brides? Wһаt ԁο уου wish уου һаԁ done differently, οr wһаt аrе уου glad уου ԁіԁ? Wһаt unique, personal touches ԁіԁ уου include іח уουr οwח wedding? Dο уου һаνе аחу сοοƖ tһουɡһtѕ οח: party favors, wedding party gifts, bridesmaids attire, invitations/programs, child attendants, showers/bachelor(ette) parties, tһе ceremony/vows/etc, wedding cake, photography/videography, tһе honeymoon? (Tһеѕе аrе јυѕt 'prompts' tο spark уουr memory - уου don't һаνе tο аחѕwеr tһеm all!!) I аm finishing mу wedding planner/workbook аחԁ want tο include tips frοm real-life brides. Yουr input аחԁ tһουɡһtѕ wουƖԁ bе a һυɡе һеƖр!!
Tags: bachelor, bridesmaids, honeymoon, invitations, life brides, memory, midst, personal touches, photography, showers, wedding cake, wedding party gifts, wedding planner
First off, congratulations on your upcoming marriage! May you have a healthy, pleased union.
After being very happily married for 18+ years, my advise is this: You don't want the wedding to overshadow the marriage. A wedding is just for 1 day, but your marriage should last your lifetime. Rule number 1: Don't sweat the small stuff. Rule number 2: It's all small stuff. Don't get so wrapped up in the knitty gritty of wedding preparation that you forget the most vital reason which is why you're there in the first place. Excellent luck and best wishes to you both!
DETERMINE YOUR BUDGET AND STAY WITHIN IT
Not from me personally, but my friend was so rushed trying to get everything done that she didn't have time to delight in her wedding.
My advice would be to plot every detail way in advance and make sure that you have someone that you really trust to handle things on the actual day, so you don't have to reckon about anything, and you can delight in your day in peace.
As a wedding vendor, you have a vested interest in fostering the "It's YOUR day for your DREAM wedding; do WHATEVER you want!" attitude and it's attendant orgy of self-indulgence and overspending. So you may not like advice from a Higher Authority, in the person of Judith Manners (aka Miss Manners). But I will post it here in the hope that a few brides will use their heads for a touch besides holding a veil up.
You, out there in Brideland, you sweet thing … Are you preparation your wedding so that it will be perfect in every detail? Do you expect it to be the most pleased day of your life? Miss Manners sincerely hopes not.
Few of those who prattle about that "most pleased day" seem to consider the dour expectations this suggests about the marriage from its second day on. They don't realize that a wedding reception is basically a large party, and is therefore not perfectible because there are too variables, not to mention too many people who one thought would not accept the invitation. At any rate, someone whose thought of ultimate happiness is a day spent at a huge party, even spent being the focal top of attention at a very marvelous huge party, is too immature to get married.
This notion of a wedding persists, often working directly against the purpose of a wedding, which is to make a new family, and not to place cracks and strains in ancient ones. Miss Manners' advice to young brides is to plot weddings that will be pretty and festive, but not to attempt to make them grand on a scale unrelated to the rest of their lives, and not to expect them to be perfect. Many an otherwise lovely bride has turned hideous attempting to make a "dream" occasion and to make everyone else conform with her conception of their roles in it.
A warning that one has strayed too far afield is an unnecessary preoccupation with everything's being done "aptly". Weddings are rare events in most people's lives, and Miss Manners has no objections to the participants' seeking advice on right form. She dispenses such advice herself, aptly and left. But if one needs professional direction — not just help or advice — in every aspect of the wedding, it may mean that one hs wondered into completely foreign shared territory and should reckon about bearing home. One's wedding should be a heightened version of one's best shared life, not an occasion for people to attempt to play grand and unfamiliar roles in a fantasy play.
Another warning about expecting a perfect day is that this carries a built-in potential for disappointment. (There are adults who go owing to life expecting other people to make their birthdays perfect for them and if you ever meet one of these, watch out. Nothing will ever be enough for them.)
What Miss Manners wishes all brides is NOT the most pleased days of their lives, but a jolly gathering of family and friends, in which they are the object of general admiration but EVERYONE has a excellent time. They will then have some happiness left over with which to live happily every after.
Congratulations! The only thing that you have to remember is that this day is only about you and your husband to be, no one else. Just relax & try to focus on the reason you fell in like in the first place. That will help you stay cool and help you to remember why your really doing this to start with. I wish I had more of a hand in preparation my wedding even if, things were nothing like I wanted them. Make sure that you dont settle for a touch you dont really care for. You'll end up regretting it later. It's your wedding and your choice. What you say goes. GoodLuck!
I have one tip.
My wedding was in 2004.
Instead of place cards and favors, we had a bunch of blank CD's made with our names, the date and a picture on it. Then we burned 10-12 songs that meant a lot to my husband and I on it. I place the CD's in semi-clear envelopes and slid in a card that I printed out with the same picture on it and the couples name and the word table on it. Then when we did table seating, my mom and I just wrote in marker the table number and we slid them into the sleeve with the CD. They were on the table near the guest book, and couples picked up the CD and knew where they sat. I got a lot of complements on the table card/favor.
My sister just got engaged and I can't wait to help her plot her wedding. I want to be a wedding planner.
PLAN
The larger the production the more that can go incorrect
Delegate …… Wisely
PLAN
Get your friends and family caught up.
Remember your Mum just wants the best for you
No. He doesn't know, but he likes you and is still trying
PLAN
Chose a theme. Colour or style. Stick to it
Eat the reception food before the wedding so you know if it sucks
PLAN
Have a backup plot
Find your most Anal obsessive friend. Recruit them…..Very excellent at details.
Allocate a budget. Stick to it
Remember it is just 1 day and you have the rest of your lives together. What is more vital a dress you will wear once or a house?
Did I mention you should PLAN
always keep your budget in mind and never try to go over it or you will find yourself in debt real quick
Buy a wedding planner. It will be your best friend even if out the whole roller coaster ride. It will keep you aptly on track as far as which items you should have by a certain time frame. It will help you answer questions like "When should we get fitted for our rings?" or "What would be the best order for the wedding party to enter and exit the ceremony?"
Get very familiar with theknot.com, they were a huge help to me. They will walk you owing to every step up until your huge day. I tried to focus on the huge picture like, how pleased my fiancee and I were going to be together instead of getting cought up in all the details. Be patient with your friends and family, they will give tons of uninvited suggestions, but even even if it is annoying, remember they mean well. We had all our married relatives bring framed pics of their wedding and showed them on the cake table, everyone felt included and loved seeing their photo on our table. For favors, stick with food, everyone likes to eat and the small trinkets just get thrown away. For bridesmaids gifts try to do a touch different and personal for each girl. For example, if one girl likes shopping give her giftcards to her favorite stores, or if a girl likes cooking give her cooking supplies or cooking classes. They will appreciate being treated as individuals. invitationsbydawn.com has fantastic, economic invites.Congrats and excellent luck.
First and foremost, determine who is paying and who is the final choice-maker. This will eliminate unnecessary arguments and provide some guidance. Second, plot ahead! Don't wait until the last small to get things done. Plot early so you can delight in yourself. Third, when alternative out favors, remember that a lot of times they are left behind, but if you choose a touch that is edible, i.e. chocolates, cookies, wine, the favors will be worth the money spent.
You do NOT have to spend a million dollars (figurativly language of course) to have a wonderful day. Remember, this is the first day of the rest of your life.
Write your own vows. They mean the most to you.
Have family caught up! They are SO cute.
Make sure to get a fantastic photographer. When the wedding is over, all you have left is the marriage and the pics! But do not break the bank….there are many individuals and companies out there that dont charge an arm and a leg.
Excellent Luck!
Plot, plot, plot. Try to reckon of any and everything that is caught up in any wedding you have gone to. Make an outline, keep all of your notes together in one booklet, hold on to it for dear life. Excellent preparation will lead to no "ooops, we forgot" on the wedding day. Try to have everything lined out at least two weeks prior to the wedding. Take everyone into consideration, from fiance', yours/his parents, your/his friends, relatives. It's your day, it's your way but don't make decisions that you will unhappiness for the rest of your life. Be considerate. .
i was married last sept best advice go to weddingchannals.com is awesome site……… also be sure an take time fer jus u each day…… the last week fer sure…… pamper yurself mornin of yur wedding…… an relax an lov da day….
Remember the mantra. No matter what obstacles you face, what trauma comes your way, do again this phrase and smile, "When this is done, I am going to be Mrs. (insert groom's name here)." The rest is just trimming.
(And, question a friend to have a car waiting, with a full tank of gas, to be the get away driver> This is just in case you change your mind at the last small. Knowing that you have options is calming.)
I just got married on May 6th of this year. After it is over now I have a lot of things i would have done differantly….Make sure you have a babysitter if you already have kids…and not one who is staying for the reception. Have someone cater and decorate…it was less expensive but more stressful! Dont stress out about everything! Have a honeymoon and ENJOY YOUR DAY! it will be over in an instant make the best of it…..if you stress out about everything youll miss the fun! My wedding ceremony was perfect! The only thing I would have changed is my reception. My family didnt get to delight in it because they were cleaning up the food and all that. MAKE SURE YOU HAVE SOME ONE CATER that will do everything….cleaning up and all!
if u r having music.
u want to make sure u know what u want.
i play violin at weddings and alot of the time the bride and groom dont know what they want…
it is very annoying when people r going back nd forth for bout 15 20 min
soo u need to plot out what u exactly want and figure out how u want the bridesmaids to walk down and the grooms men to walk …alll before the reshersal for the wedding …sooo things willl go smoothly
Just two tips, make sure to delegate some things, this will take some of the stress off of you, and will keep some people (especially moms) from feeling left out. Buy some of those disposible cameras to place on the tables at the reception, and question your guests to take pictures of each other. There is always someone that you wish the photographer had captured, but by the time you see your wedding proofs, it is too late. Most of all, have fun! Congrats!
Recent wedding experiences included lousy food (many guests were vomiting a few hours after) and a photographer who didn't notice that the cap was on the lens until the wedding reception was nearly over! Both brides were devastated! Hope this helps and gives you a few thoughts. (1) have more cameras and take additional photos besides your hired photographer and (2) check out the food PRIOR to your wedding. Excellent luck.
I just got married on June 3, 2006.
I would say that
1) Developing a budget saves a lot of stress
2) Choose what YOU want before you start talking to family members and your marriage party. Otherwise, everyone has some kind of problem with your choices.
3) Take care of everything as soon as you can. Make your favors early, make your programs early, anything that can be done in advance, do it! Don't waste too much time and then spend the week before your wedding scrambling to get things done.
4) Don't choose people for your marriage party who are irresponsible! It will save you so much grief!