WһіƖе preparation уουr wedding, wһаt ԁіԁ уου learn wаѕ a myth? Wе һаνе ѕο many tһουɡһtѕ аbουt weddings аחԁ һοw tһеу ѕһουƖԁ ɡο, bυt many people find out things tһеу didn't know аbουt wedding preparation.

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20 Comments to “What is one thing you learned about planning a wedding?”

  1. jeannielunchbox says:

    That the details matter the most. Largest myth of all time. Don't kill yourself over silly things like invitations, ceremony programs, ribbon, linens, etc…

    On my wedding day, I didn't even notice most of the details. I did notice the flowers…and that was about it.

    Maybe other people, like guests, noticed the smaller details, but I didn't.

  2. Soon2BMrsGupta says:

    Well I remember being told repeatedly that the groom doesn't care about anything you do. He just shows up.

    My fiance wants to know every small detail and be included in everything, it is fantastic!

  3. Tricia R says:

    Plotted and paid for my own, helped to plot and pay for two of my family's, and attended hundeds. Very vital - that the bride and groom each really like what they are wearing. Extremely vital - the photographs - they are what you have after most everything else is a memory. Really vital - staying within your budget. Vital - making sure that no one gets drunk and does a touch embarrassing. And doubtless one of the most vital things is writing thank you notes.

  4. confusedgirly says:

    Well the largest myth I have learned is that 2nd time brides are not to wear white. Back in the day this was right, but now 2nd or even 3rd time brides are choosing white to signify a new beginning. I am still going with a champagne color since it looks better with my skin tones. I reckon the largest disappointments are that my father will not be able to walk me down the aisle the 2nd time around…so I will have to deal with those jitters all by myself this time! I also didn't realize how expensive everything is from flowers, to the reception, to wedding party gifts. Oh well, I am sure it will all be worth it when my wedding day arrives!

  5. firebetty74 says:

    I agree with the first answer…your fiance may say he's not attracted, but he might be more than he's letting you know. I also found that you need to be VERY organized. If you aren't, you'll be frazzled. Especially the closer your wedding date gets.

    Here's a few that sound like myths..but aren't.

    Weddings are ridiculously expensive…this is right.
    Your family will act crazy and tell you how to plot your wedding and who to invite…this is right.
    You will encounter snooty marriage boutique salesgirls…this is right.
    Your wedding date approaches quicker than you realize…this is right.

  6. fizzy stuff says:

    1. The % of your budget that you should spend on this or that- its different for everyone.
    2. That things are cheaper on a Friday- in our case that was not right but that was the only day available for the venue so we took it.
    3. That you can save money by making things yourself- I wanted to make invitations and programs myself so Im not argumentative about the cost, but they cost a lot more than if I had them professionally done.

  7. brwneyes says:

    I am still preparation, but here is what I have learned so far:

    1. It will cost more than you reckon it will. Set a budget, but also know that you should save ahead of time.

    2. The guest list is trying to wean down. Everyone has their opinions on who you should invite. This has been the most trying for me so far.

    3. Look everywhere for dresses. Don't let people's opinions about places sway you. For example, I went into David's Marriage thinking that I would never find anything and I found a gorgeous dress. Our local chain has pretty excellent service, from what I have heard.

    4 Be prepared to be stressed, but in a excellent way!

    Edit: I also agree with Soon2be Mrs. Gupta-fiances do want to be caught up-at least mine does! It is nice.

  8. unusualkiss says:

    I learnt that everyone has an opinion and that no matter how much money you spend someone will find fault with it. I spent $50,000 on my wedding and I still had people complain that the cake was too small and that I should have had a chocolate cake instead.

    #1 thing to remember about your wedding is that it's your wedding and do what you want. Someone will find fault with a touch.

  9. mynxr says:

    It's just a day and things are going to go incorrect no matter what you do. There's no such thing as a perfect wedding. Pay attention to everything because it goes quickly and you'll want to be able to remember the small things. The wedding isn't nearly as vital as the day to day marriage. Saying I do can change a guy and how he behaves. Whatever you do, don't sweat the small stuff and delight in the day!

  10. 9lives says:

    I reckon that the largest myth is that a home wedding is simple. Gosh you dont know how many people reckon that doing it at home would be the best and it turns out to be a disaster.

  11. Cinders says:

    My friend has found that 'preparation a wedding is stressful' seems to be the largest myth of all. She has nearly everything plotted for next year already and has barely lifted a finger. She is barely worrying about anything at all

  12. Tiana says:

    I agree with the grooms don't do anything, they just show up myth. TOTALLY realized that wasn't right now that I'm preparation my wedding. And I'm glad! When me and my fiance first got engadged a year ago, I thought, "Oh boy, what am I going to do? I CAN'T do this on my own!", but my fiance proved me incorrect. He wanted to help me with every single thing. From the food, to even the colors.

    Which also brings me to the "every single detail counts" myth. I'm not married yet, but I have learned that some details a lot of brides stress over, aren't going to be such a huge deal at my wedding!

    The cost, I spent $97,862 on this wedding. Weddings can add up!

    I am wearing a white dress, but I do know that not all brides wear white. It is just a fact of life. I have learned that from being a Maid Of Honor and Brides Maid many times.

    But over all, the most vital thing I have learned by preparation this wedding is that, the only thing that will really matter in the end is that I am finally married to my one right like that I plot to be with forever.

    Congrats to all of the already brides out there and those nearly brides!

  13. Corty B says:

    I'm learning that my fiance, who didn't want to be invovled in the preparation what-so-ever, is now upset with the fact that he's getting nothing he wants. He wanted lots of rock music for the reception, but doesn't know that some of my 70 year ancient + guests just will not like hearing Metallica. He's got no problem offending my elderly family members, and refuses to accept that later in the evening when the grown-up people leave, that the reception will turn into a rockfest.

    I also learned that nearly all responcibility lies squarely on the shoulders of the brides family.

  14. JuliaGulia says:

    Never try and please everyone by doing what everyone else suggest you do. Do what you want and not what your mother or grandmother want. It only makes things harder and more stressful when everyone is giving you 'advice' and doesn't want to help too.

  15. navillus_100 says:

    Well the thing I was told was the groom won't care…Well I am a groom and here I am preparation the wedding, while my fiancee is studying…Just thought I would add that.
    http://navillus99.blogspot.com

  16. Mathie says:

    I've never been one for huge weddings. That just isn't my style. I've always been told that no matter how the wedding goes, it's the marriage that matters. I've always firmly believed that but now that I'm the one about to get married, I know it for sure! We are having a simple reception after getting married at the courthouse. We both just want to be married. Even preparation the reception has taught us a lot. Compromise is vital and thinking ahead is vital. Remember that the wedding day is just the first of many days. As long as you are officially married at the end of your wedding day then it was a successful day, no matter what else went incorrect. In the end, the most expensive and elaborate dream wedding can't save a doomed marriage. While wedding preparation is vital, marriage preparation is more vital.

    One thing I've found is that so many people, particularly brides, focus on tons and tons of details. The first dance, flower choices, centerpieces, table preparations, etc. All those things are nice but in the end, no one cares more than the person who plotted them. If the wedding overall looks pretty and elegant then that's fantastic but no one is going to pay attention to detail like the person who plotted the wedding. I reckon people need to relax more about all the small details. I had a friend who got married and spent the entire day worrying about the wedding. She spent a fantastic deal of time even worrying if the ice sculpture would melt too quick. At the end of the day she had just about forgotten about her husband because she was asking her bridesmaid and mom to make sure everything was in order. Yes, details can be plotted, but don't freak out about them. The day is just one day. There are so many images of the "perfect" wedding out there and so many people buy into it like it's the only way to have a wedding.

    The largest myth I've learned is that you don't have to have the "perfect" wedding to be pleased. I've never bought into this but my experience has certainly proved it a myth. So many people have told me that my fiance and can't maybe be pleased with what we're having for our wedding. So many people have said that we're going to unhappiness having a small wedding day. Note that none of these people have ever been married and have therefore never had a wedding. Even even if there are still four and a half weeks until the huge day, we haven't once regretted our wedding plans. We look forward to becoming husband and wife and look forward the many days together as a married couple. We like and care for each other and want to be married. No amount or lack of wedding preparation can change that feeling or bring unhappiness.

  17. MissE says:

    That you HAVE to do anything.
    We chose we wanted out wedding the way we wanted it and not how the rest of the world and everybody else thought we should want it.
    So no date, no marriage party, no bit huge dress, no huge party but simple and stylish Lavish where we want it, restrained where we choose.

  18. Mrs.10/18/08 says:

    The one myth that I have found to be untrue is that "Wedding Preparation is SO MUCH FUN!!!!!"

    Don't get me incorrect, I am super-excited to be getting married, and some parts are fun - like dress shopping and being creative and stuff like that…

    But it's muuuuuch more stressful than anyone ever told me it would be! When you're a small girl, and you're preparation your dream wedding - you're not taking into account prices per place setting, and will this color go with that one, and will people reckon this is a stupid favor, and this side of the family wants to invite 20 more people?!?!, and Mom and Dad can't be in the same room with each other for more than 5 minutes, and, oh yeah, how are we going to PAY for all of this?! LOL…

    I really am excited to be getting married to the man of my dreams, but I'm a small dissappointed that preparation hasn't been as much fun as it was when I was a small girl just dreaming….

    Excellent luck!

  19. Buzzy Bee says:

    The things I have learned are:
    * It is more expensive than you reckon, and things quickly add up.

    * You will never please everyone! Do what YOU want for the wedding, there is always one in the group that will whinge about your choices etc. but as it's your day, I doubt anyone is going to get up in the middle of the speeches and say 'you know, I really don't like your choice of napkin folding…..'

    * it takes a LOT of organising and preparation. As I am a very organised person I handled it okay, but someone who does not have excellent organisational skills should seek help from a trusted friend or family member or a wedding planner

  20. dana says:

    dont get too many people caught up… they start to fight and try to plot it for you.

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